RH3 #1156 The Jimmy Buffet Hash
It started on a cold blustery very punctual circle, which doesn’t happen much in C-anal Street parking lot. General erections were given and we zigzag through the south side of the city to eventually come to southside cemetery where i was greeted with most of my deceased family from the 1800s. we found Boat drinks in an old burial vault/neglected graveside. More zigzag through Reading streets where Vanna blackout conversed openly with all the Español speaking residents of the city. Then we ran up the dangerous alley of broken dreams. Yes, there were knives, live wires, neglected pitbull‘s , bike parts, a lot of broken TVs and somebody’s complete wardrobe thrown in the alley. We finally managed to find the walkers who were happily drinking margaritas in a warm cozy parking garage on Chestnut Street. As we waited for the margarita van to pull up Opto struggled to parallel park. God knows how she got her license ! after our very fulfilling Margaritas we headed down chestnut street to the Open acres of vacant lots followed by heading over to Penske Beach. The most sought after beach in Berks County. We froze our asses on Penske Beach. A lot of us relieve our bladders waiting for Legals arrival, DFL, she finally appeared after we were half frozen. down downs were had, songs were sung, followed by 2 mile run back to the cars at C-anal Street Parking lot.Love u long time bitches!Choo-choo 🚂🚂
RH3 #1155 The Stir-Up Sunday Hash
On a windy Sunday afternoon we met at the exquisite Blue Marsh Canteen. As legend has it there was a bridal shower with two women who were quite interested in hashing. The group exchanged some stories and they were hooked. After more conversation our group had to depart as the soon to be hashers continued brunching.
We circled up and had an out of towner with us. Dr. Meat Rocket graced us with his presence coming all the way south from Buffalo (BH3). Hashers don’t always follow migratory patterns so we lucked out because it was very fun to have him join. After names were announced our hare took off to lay trail live.
Some time had passed and then the chase was on! We entered the nearby game lands to catch our hare. Most of us listened and wore orange to alert the nearby hunters. The trail was shorter than what we had expected Crack to lay, but there was definitely enough distance to lay two shot nears with delicious pudding shots and a beer near with a variety of expiration dates all of which had been passed.
While traversing the terrain some of the runners got caught in the shiggy, One Knee found a secret message, and the walkers even caught our hare.
After everyone crossed the HHH we all circled up. Accusations were made, beers were drank, and songs were sung. We finished the night with pizza and pitchers of beer at BMC where it all started.
On-On!
Just Jeremy
RH3 #1154 Sesame Street Hash
Waiting on: URBAN DICK
RH3 #1153 Hashy Halloween
On a beautiful fall day a group of half minds and misfits gathered upon the beautiful overlook of Douglassville (Birdsboro/Union Township?). All manners of costumes had assembled. A quick game off as the local park ranger admired the brilliance of RH3. Circle formed. Introductions and hash symbols were presented. A brief explanation to one of the hares as to what one of the marks he had laid signified. General erection led us downhill. Trail was picked up but we all quickly remarked about the spacing of the marks. Perhaps foretelling…
Will they lead us all the way down the switchbacks? Nope false, we are led off into a roughly mowed trail many didn’t know existed. Out to the woods edge and then along the perimeter. Does trail go into the briars? A mark and then nothing. An upside down BN is spotted. Beers and blood procured. Discussions and pointers are had about how to get the blood from the IV bags. No one could suck hard enough so gravity shots it was.
Trail continued around the briar perimeter as many drew blood from the crudely cut shiggy. We had rejoined the switchbacks and continued to the main SRT trail. We headed west toward Fork & Ale hoping for another beer stop. The local school children again admired the happy bunch of half wits decked out in costume. A check as we approached the road.
What’s this? A sign proclaiming a special event ahead! A quick photo op is had. A parade in our honor? A beer festival? Nope none of that. Marks lead us down 724 and then UP Center. We climb. On-on’s ring out from the uphill FRB's. Finally a check to the right. On one. On two from the right and straight ahead. Then on-on from further up the hill. The on two is abandoned and we climb. And climb and climb till the H’s are upon us. One beer check? Where was the J check? Where are the hares? The half wits had outsmarted the hares.
Others arrive and the hares come barreling in pondering how we had all reached the H’s so quickly. Discussions about where they had gone wrong. Lessons learned but we were all very thirsty from the death march up the hill. Circle is formed. More compliments from a boat shoed local going on a hike. Accusations, down downs, new songs. Hares redeem them selves at the apres with a huge spread at Island. Another great hash
On-Out
International Man of Pleezure
RH3 #1152 Suburban Sunset Sh!tshow Hash
RH3 gets a boob job!!
Got your attention, didn’t it?? In this case we just got one done. And it’s fancy so we call it a Breast! It’s the first official hash of our new GM, Breast Stroaker. He honored us by haring his inaugural trail. And because he wanted to look like a good trail master and start filling the schedule, Peeter On A Skeeter joined the hare fun.
About a dozen or so halfminds met up at Conrad Weiser East Elementary, excited because it’s been a while since we have all been allowed within 250 feet of an elementary school. In true western Berks style a cop drove by, but for some reason we had our wits about us and didn’t have any open containers.
Choo Choo set the tone for the chilly Monday night run around Wernersville by wearing her Fet’s Luck tshirt. Unfortunately she didn’t show her upper assets to any trains…the conductors were Sucking Fcrewed!
On we went wrapping around the streets that Peeter used to drive his sexy turquoise camaro around on back in high school. We stumbled upon a BN and two Wernersville natives who were excited to reminisce on their former hippie and “other hash” enjoying days. They were cool though. Can’t be too bad, I married their son ;)
Through more neighborhoods and shiggy and falses and checks. We got a little off trail after crossing 422 and some of us missed the special shiggy and I think a water crossing. Instead we made our way to the second BN at the good ole Penn Werner, where I’m pretty sure we were the clientele with the most brains in a long time. Pitchers of shitty golden nectar were consumed. You think you’re going directly back Stitzer Rd to Breast’s house?? Kidding!! We wrapped and wrapped around the neighborhood running and yelling in the pitch dark like only us crazies knew how. The H’s were found, songs were sung, dogs drank beer, orange crunchy stuff was consumed, accusations were made, then we ended up at Paradise by the Slice where not long ago Pity Titty got her lovely name!
On On folks!
Pretty When I’m Drunk ❤
RH3 #1151 40th Analversary Hash
Being that this hash was the day after the 50th trail of the Bimbopalooza/ Optopussy era, it was a small and slightly hungover group that met at the normal intersection of Plymouth Pl and Reading Blvd. 40 years of congregating at this corner on the same date and the neighborhood still hasn’t caught on. After the stink eye and some words from said neighbors, we gathered around to get instructions from our hares: Bad Semen and Dogbreath. Before chalk talk, Bad told us the story of the original hash and passed around a xeroxed copy of a photo from that first hash. These fine hashers started what I feel is the best Kennel in the land! Them, them… fuck them!!
Trail went into Wyomissing park where we eventually found a bottle of Fireball. After some cinnamon cheer, we moved along through the park and eventually found a beer near in the alley of Ginger and Down in Front’s house. Kind of them to let us use their driveway, smart of them to not leave us a key for the house…. Trail finished in a muggle’s back yard, but luckily this muggle was related to Horn so she knew what she was getting in to. After glorious songs and accusations, one last Swing Low lead by Optopussy, now I could say I was truly “on-out” for leading circle and doing GM things!
Apres at Mangia, was followed by returning to Opto and Too-Menanite’s house to kick the keg from the 50th the night before. Wouldn’t you know it, we were successful in that endeavor.
Thanks to those before us and cheers to those that follow us!! Happy Anal!
On- Out,
Opto
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