Tuesday, October 18, 2016

RH3 # 927 Crackllversary Live!

Our beer bringing bugle boy is back at it! Crack will be laying down some live action this Sunday in an OHHH so familiar place. This trail is in honor of his 1st trail a year ago where Fuckin Deadwood made our little Crack a man!(he only required one stitch)

Make sure you bring ID, as we are staring at the Asylum of Wernersville. Uhm…they may want to keep most of your asses. Just Sayin! Yes, yes I know we were just in Wernersville last night; this promises not to be 5 mile death march straight up the Highway. Crack promises NO ROADS, GREAT LIVE TRAIL, THE FINEST BEER, NAKED BIMBOS, and a top notch spread of food!

The girth……
Hash Date: Sunday October 23rd, 2016@ 2PM
Hares: Crack & a possible Co!
Prelube: Noon @ Paradise By The Slice
63 E Penn Ave, Wernersville, PA 19565
ONON: Wernersville State Asylum
Lot A 324 Sportsman Rd, Wernersville (DRY)
1st Lot on your left on Sportsman from 422
“No Swill In This Lot Please”
Trail: Live A to B

Dry Bag: No smell all day!

See you Wanktards Sunday! FF

Tuesday, October 11, 2016

RH3 # 926 Bitch, Bitch.....Fuck You!

Father forgive us, for we know exactly what we do! Such language…...really(Pinky Out)!

I am letting this one speak for itself, no need to blabble on. With a title like this...i am sure the whole kennel and every out of towner we know will drop by!

Date: Monday 10/17 @ 6:15
Hares:Frank Burns Father FermentMe and Just Elizabeth
Prelube: Tavern on Penn Opens at 4PM.
(2601 Penn Ave, West Lawn, PA 19609)
On On: Penn Ave. and Rt 724
(the Old Food Lion lot)
Hash cash: $7
Trail: 'A to Fuck You'
Dry Bags highly encouraged.

Bring a light...or be stupid and get lost....or both! Oh yeah did I mention that Father & Frank Brew Beer together!!  

See you Monday FF

Highley Tecnical map to CUMMMMM

Monday, October 3, 2016

RH3 #925 The Half Way There "Short Straw Hash"

Woooooooah Livin' On  A Prayer.....It's time to Christen the Club House South Bitches!!

So What is the Short Straw Hash??
let's start with the basics
When: OCT 10, 2016
Hash Cash $5
(The rest wil be subsidized by Toe Fu's profit from #924)
Hares go off @ 6:10 SHARP so get there by 6:00pm

1501 Lancaster Ave, Reading, PA 19607

First we meet up @ Liberty Ale House
The Short straw is the 1st hare of the night
They choose a partner to help them lay trail
We give them flour, chalk, a map and money
they take us to another bar (clearly marked on the map)
The Hares head out and start laying trail
They get a 10 min head start... Head? Who Said Head?
The hash tries to catch the hares before they get to the next bar
We get to the bar, we drink at the bar, we Draw Straws and
repeat as necessary.
Eventually we get back to Liberty for the Apres

It's dark out early...bring cranium illumination of you wish! 


Thursday, September 22, 2016

RH3# 924 "From Hare To Eternity"

Following our Analversary we have Hash #924 “From Hare To Eternity”! This witty entitlement is brought to you by Toe FU & Sucks It In!  

Any time Toe Fu hares a trail three things are for sure. For 1..there is 100% chance mother nature will F&#K him. Two...we will get 300 anal instructions on where to park, circle, stand, drink, how to act and who not make to mad. And 3...There is a very good possibly that literally no trail will be found anywhere!

He sent me a picture to use from the 1950’s movie he twisted the title from, but it just was not a FF picture so I picked my own! (Sorry FU) you post plenty anyway! This movie does have many hash like qualities…..disobeying the rules, a bugler, semen, singing, asians, explosions….. you get the point!

The Anal Bits…
HASH DATE: 10/1/2016 2PEEE m
HARES: Sucks It In & Toe FU
HOST TOWN: Hamburg, the home of the King Frost, Hemburgerrfest, Toe Fu, Jack Rowe and and big Rocks and Dam’s to get drunk and fling yourself off of.
PRELUBE: Jake’s Place, this place has more rules then the Neuengamme Concentration Camp.
(3557 Old U.S. 22, Hamburg PA 19526)
PARKING: Across the street at the School Lot. Apparently Jake had enough of us at Get you Tip out of my Clam!
ONON: 2PM Behind Jake's..at 50 paces, as to not disturb the “real” patrons.
(3557 Old U.S. 22, Hamburg PA 19526)
DRY BAGS: FU is blabbeling about some Blue Marsh Creek and the Schuylkill so yes!

Oh yeah, and according to Toe FU rule # 300 Jake would also like us not to have an alcohol in public near his establishment haha!

See you in Hamburg Bitches this should be a good one!! ONON FF


Monday, September 12, 2016

RH3#923 The Happy Birthday / Analversary Day Hash!

Happy Birthday F&^k US! Yes it’s that time of year again, the time when we go back to where it all began 32 years ago. The one day of the year that Wyomissing cringes as the RH3 debaucherist’s get all up in um’! This hash is a stroll down Mamory lane, and may be the one time of year our Founding Father graces us with his presence! If you don’t know who the founding father of the Reading Hash is I suggest you find out beforehand. Failing the pre circle RH3 History quiz is no small offence. Newbies you better study up! Sexual favors for history lessons are available, or showing up in your birthday suite excuses you from questioning!

The waxy stuff….
Tour guide: NFB & Dances With Whores
Date: Thursday 9:22 @ 6:15
ONON: Reading Boulevard & Plymouth Place, Wyomissing, PA 19610, USA
(Hint this is where the 1st RH3 trail started)
HASH CASH: $1 Apres is On You!
(OOP that’s some old school shit right there!)
PRELUBE: West Reading Tavern
Trails: A to A
Dry Bag: Always a good idea!

Let get our Birthday ON Bitches!

Monday, September 5, 2016


Right on the heels of Hookup, we calm things down a little with the return of the Family Hash and Picnic!

“The Family Hash Bash” was a Tradition of RH3 in the days of Ol’ but somewhere along the way it got lost. Well this is one tradition we would like to see come back, so we scheduled it!

What exactly is a Family Hash? It’s about just what it sounds like…YES there will be a trail! Basic for the most part with some Eagle splits for the “Bigger” kids, but kid friendly for sure. Some “Basic” introductions and instructions will be given pre hash. We will circle up for some creative entertainment post Hash.  And finish up by enjoying a picnic with our RH3 hash Family!

HARES – Mismanagement
ONON - Egelman's Park
(2001 Hill Rd, Reading, PA 19602)
DATE – Sunday September 11th
TIME – 1PM arrival, Trail 1:30PM
ONON – Egelman’s Park
HASH CASH - $5 per Adult all kids under 21 are free.

What is covered in your Hash Cash? Pre Beverages, Kid and Adult trail beverages, grilled Burgers and Dogs, More Kids Beverages, Orange protein and such. Please feel free to bring something to share at the Picnic in the form of a covered dish, adult beverages, snacks, deserts or just your company.

What if you don’t have a family or Kids……I do have one family and about 6 or 7 kids to rent out. They are not the greatest but not very expensive for a day rental. They do need to be returned by 6pm. Seriously though, this is not only for Family’s or Kids it’s for the whole Kennel.

Any questions hit us up…..i am sure I missed something. Let’s Picnic Bitches! FF

Wednesday, August 24, 2016

RH3#921 LVH3#260 –The RH3 / LVH3 Hookup / Interfuck / JointHash!

DID YOU SAY JOINTHASH??.….yes, yes we did! Four bad ass motherfuckers got together one day and said; why the fuck did the RH3 / LVH3 INTERFUCK die?? Well who the hell knows, but what I can tell you is….it’s back. And if you miss this hookup, remove Wank for your Vocabulary!!

A HOOKUP – Sexual activity, though typically not coitus. Usually implies more than kissing or “Making Out”. Making out + Touching Breasts would qualify as a HOOKUP!  N.(English, Websters)  

How do 4 halfminds even come up with a plan to relive the days of Ol’?? Well it’s not easy.  As is proclaimed in the Gospel according to Bad Semen, when you put halfminds together we do not become stronger, but increasingly stupider! We are not added together for strength, but multiplied by ignorance. 1 Hasher = ½ Mind…2 Hashers = ¼ Mind….4 of us together supply a whopping 1/16 of a MIND. Thank you for trusting in us to run this event, as if you had a choice!

STUPIDER –Adjective /’st(y)o͞opÉ™dr/   The act of becoming more stupid (Hashing?). The word that should be a word but people are too afraid to make it Ligit. You are becoming stupider every second you read this! A.(Slanglish, Brewsters)

Two things tie these ever so closely located kennels together. Well, other than being whiskey puking degenerates and that we live for beer, shiggy, and song! First off, both Kennels have adopted Liberty Taproom as their clubhouse of choice and second, both were pulled from the Anals with versarys of September. This event is our way of dropping our load and staining the books of tradition as a time that RH3 & LVH3 shall cum together and celebrate once a year! The plan being that LVh3 will host this even in the year of the Cock!  

With all that rambling it may take more than 1/16th of a mind to figure out what I am saying.

#THEINTURFUCKENINFO…..as I can remember!

HASH DATE - The 3rd Day of September in the year of the Monkey!
FREE BUS TO READING FOR LVH3– Taproom On Liberty Departure 11AM
(Space is Limited)(2246 Liberty St, Allentown PA 18104)(Round Trip)
PRELUBE – Liberty Taproom Reading, PA (Opens at 11)
ONON – Liberty Taproom Reading, PA
(237 North Prospect Street Readng PA. 19606)
CIRCLE – 1PM PROMPT– Don’t be late…the Hash waits for no one.
PACK OUT -1:05 PM – Not 1:06 or 1:07 so be on time LVH3!
TRAIL – A to ?? Live ?? Dead?? SHITTY – YES!
DRY BAG – I personally could give a shit less but other may not want to smell you all day.
HASH CASH - $$15 - This will include food and swill post Hash!

Spread the word….shit is about to get real! Foot Fairy

Cock – [KOK] A device for regulating the flow of a liquid. A person of spirit and often of a certain swagger or arrogance. (Noun, English, Merriam)