Thursday, September 22, 2016

RH3# 924 "From Hare To Eternity"

Following our Analversary we have Hash #924 “From Hare To Eternity”! This witty entitlement is brought to you by Toe FU & Sucks It In!  

Any time Toe Fu hares a trail three things are for sure. For 1..there is 100% chance mother nature will F&#K him. Two...we will get 300 anal instructions on where to park, circle, stand, drink, how to act and who not make to mad. And 3...There is a very good possibly that literally no trail will be found anywhere!

He sent me a picture to use from the 1950’s movie he twisted the title from, but it just was not a FF picture so I picked my own! (Sorry FU) you post plenty anyway! This movie does have many hash like qualities…..disobeying the rules, a bugler, semen, singing, asians, explosions….. you get the point!

The Anal Bits…
HASH DATE: 10/1/2016 2PEEE m
HARES: Sucks It In & Toe FU
HOST TOWN: Hamburg, the home of the King Frost, Hemburgerrfest, Toe Fu, Jack Rowe and and big Rocks and Dam’s to get drunk and fling yourself off of.
PRELUBE: Jake’s Place, this place has more rules then the Neuengamme Concentration Camp.
(3557 Old U.S. 22, Hamburg PA 19526)
PARKING: Across the street at the School Lot. Apparently Jake had enough of us at Get you Tip out of my Clam!
ONON: 2PM Behind Jake' 50 paces, as to not disturb the “real” patrons.
(3557 Old U.S. 22, Hamburg PA 19526)
DRY BAGS: FU is blabbeling about some Blue Marsh Creek and the Schuylkill so yes!

Oh yeah, and according to Toe FU rule # 300 Jake would also like us not to have an alcohol in public near his establishment haha!

See you in Hamburg Bitches this should be a good one!! ONON FF


Monday, September 12, 2016

RH3#923 The Happy Birthday / Analversary Day Hash!

Happy Birthday F&^k US! Yes it’s that time of year again, the time when we go back to where it all began 32 years ago. The one day of the year that Wyomissing cringes as the RH3 debaucherist’s get all up in um’! This hash is a stroll down Mamory lane, and may be the one time of year our Founding Father graces us with his presence! If you don’t know who the founding father of the Reading Hash is I suggest you find out beforehand. Failing the pre circle RH3 History quiz is no small offence. Newbies you better study up! Sexual favors for history lessons are available, or showing up in your birthday suite excuses you from questioning!

The waxy stuff….
Tour guide: NFB & Dances With Whores
Date: Thursday 9:22 @ 6:15
ONON: Reading Boulevard & Plymouth Place, Wyomissing, PA 19610, USA
(Hint this is where the 1st RH3 trail started)
HASH CASH: $1 Apres is On You!
(OOP that’s some old school shit right there!)
PRELUBE: West Reading Tavern
Trails: A to A
Dry Bag: Always a good idea!

Let get our Birthday ON Bitches!

Monday, September 5, 2016


Right on the heels of Hookup, we calm things down a little with the return of the Family Hash and Picnic!

“The Family Hash Bash” was a Tradition of RH3 in the days of Ol’ but somewhere along the way it got lost. Well this is one tradition we would like to see come back, so we scheduled it!

What exactly is a Family Hash? It’s about just what it sounds like…YES there will be a trail! Basic for the most part with some Eagle splits for the “Bigger” kids, but kid friendly for sure. Some “Basic” introductions and instructions will be given pre hash. We will circle up for some creative entertainment post Hash.  And finish up by enjoying a picnic with our RH3 hash Family!

HARES – Mismanagement
ONON - Egelman's Park
(2001 Hill Rd, Reading, PA 19602)
DATE – Sunday September 11th
TIME – 1PM arrival, Trail 1:30PM
ONON – Egelman’s Park
HASH CASH - $5 per Adult all kids under 21 are free.

What is covered in your Hash Cash? Pre Beverages, Kid and Adult trail beverages, grilled Burgers and Dogs, More Kids Beverages, Orange protein and such. Please feel free to bring something to share at the Picnic in the form of a covered dish, adult beverages, snacks, deserts or just your company.

What if you don’t have a family or Kids……I do have one family and about 6 or 7 kids to rent out. They are not the greatest but not very expensive for a day rental. They do need to be returned by 6pm. Seriously though, this is not only for Family’s or Kids it’s for the whole Kennel.

Any questions hit us up…..i am sure I missed something. Let’s Picnic Bitches! FF

Wednesday, August 24, 2016

RH3#921 LVH3#260 –The RH3 / LVH3 Hookup / Interfuck / JointHash!

DID YOU SAY JOINTHASH??.….yes, yes we did! Four bad ass motherfuckers got together one day and said; why the fuck did the RH3 / LVH3 INTERFUCK die?? Well who the hell knows, but what I can tell you is….it’s back. And if you miss this hookup, remove Wank for your Vocabulary!!

A HOOKUP – Sexual activity, though typically not coitus. Usually implies more than kissing or “Making Out”. Making out + Touching Breasts would qualify as a HOOKUP!  N.(English, Websters)  

How do 4 halfminds even come up with a plan to relive the days of Ol’?? Well it’s not easy.  As is proclaimed in the Gospel according to Bad Semen, when you put halfminds together we do not become stronger, but increasingly stupider! We are not added together for strength, but multiplied by ignorance. 1 Hasher = ½ Mind…2 Hashers = ¼ Mind….4 of us together supply a whopping 1/16 of a MIND. Thank you for trusting in us to run this event, as if you had a choice!

STUPIDER –Adjective /’st(y)o͞opədr/   The act of becoming more stupid (Hashing?). The word that should be a word but people are too afraid to make it Ligit. You are becoming stupider every second you read this! A.(Slanglish, Brewsters)

Two things tie these ever so closely located kennels together. Well, other than being whiskey puking degenerates and that we live for beer, shiggy, and song! First off, both Kennels have adopted Liberty Taproom as their clubhouse of choice and second, both were pulled from the Anals with versarys of September. This event is our way of dropping our load and staining the books of tradition as a time that RH3 & LVH3 shall cum together and celebrate once a year! The plan being that LVh3 will host this even in the year of the Cock!  

With all that rambling it may take more than 1/16th of a mind to figure out what I am saying.


HASH DATE - The 3rd Day of September in the year of the Monkey!
FREE BUS TO READING FOR LVH3– Taproom On Liberty Departure 11AM
(Space is Limited)(2246 Liberty St, Allentown PA 18104)(Round Trip)
PRELUBE – Liberty Taproom Reading, PA (Opens at 11)
ONON – Liberty Taproom Reading, PA
(237 North Prospect Street Readng PA. 19606)
CIRCLE – 1PM PROMPT– Don’t be late…the Hash waits for no one.
PACK OUT -1:05 PM – Not 1:06 or 1:07 so be on time LVH3!
TRAIL – A to ?? Live ?? Dead?? SHITTY – YES!
DRY BAG – I personally could give a shit less but other may not want to smell you all day.
HASH CASH - $$15 - This will include food and swill post Hash!

Spread the word….shit is about to get real! Foot Fairy

Cock – [KOK] A device for regulating the flow of a liquid. A person of spirit and often of a certain swagger or arrogance. (Noun, English, Merriam)

Thursday, August 18, 2016

RH3# 920 - The Cherry Pie Hash!

Dirty, Rotten, Filthy, Stinkin…

That’s how the song starts; can this group of Misfits live up to this title? Will we be screaming this post trail?? A trail that appears to be the last Monday night trail of the year….WTF it’s only August. Say it aint’ so.

Swingin’ to the left
Swingin’ to the right
If I think about baseball
I’ll swing all night…yea

Let’s get down to it. Our beloved Hot Lips has taken on a rather large task here. Not only is she leading the Hyman wrecking of 3 Virgin Hares (Man Tits, Just Christina & Just Becky) but I also hear there will be 2 trails. They tell us Turkey / Eagle options will be available to accommodate wanks that wish to walk or wanks that wish to run. YES BAD it is LGBTA friendly as well.  

A HINT FROM FF – When you see the “T” or the “E” on trial T=TOUGH & E=EASY……really you can trust me!

Man Tits is Haring the walking trail live, but my guess is if you get anywhere close to catching him he will simply boob check you. This also could possibly be the 1st trail he has actually been on….and since he has never seen a full trail I am sure his marking skills are on point. This Cluster Fuck is not to be missed!!

The Crusty Stuff…
Hares – Hot Lips, Praying Man Tits, Just Christina, Just Becky
ONON – August 22nd @ 6:15 PA Dutch Farmers Market
845 Woodland Rd, Wyomissing, PA 19610, USA
DRY BAG – Always a good idea

Swingin’ in there cause, She wanted me to feed her……So I mixed up the batter, And she licked the BEATER!!

See You Monday FF

Tuesday, August 9, 2016

RH3 # 919 - Tres Amigos!!

This Sunday Excursion is brought to you by, ok ok hold up a second…..I need to get something out of my system. “I’ll fill you so full of lead you’ll be using your dick for a pencil” “El Guapo you have a plethora of piñatas…what the F is plethora” “ You’re a son of a motherless goat” “Together we raped the horses and rode off on the women” ” Daa Bullets”………

Ok sorry…I love this movie. Anyway this Sunday we have a good one on tap. Three of our beloved are teaming up without being strapped down by any justs and dishing it out! I hear of a live haring and by the start location some new territory. Please note there is a bit of a time change on this, we realize this brakes from tradition, just deal with it. If you see any of the old heads throughout the week remind them it’s a 1PM trail this weekend. They are old are have trouble remembering things.

HARES – Vira Wangless, Bones & Crack
ONON – 8/14 Sly Fox Brewing Pottstown “1:00 PM”
331Circle of Progress, Pottstown 19464
PRELUBE – Sly Fox Brewing they open at 11:30
TRAIL – A to B Live
DRY BAG – Recommended

Going to be a fun ass RH3 weekend…..FF

Friday, July 29, 2016

RH3# 916 - Making Reading Dangerous Again

Ok Wanks!! After a small and well deserved intermission we return with some Monday Madness and have Deathwish….Making Reading Dangerous Again!

A big welcome home to Deathwish, it’s about time he cumms back to his home kennel and graces us with some shittyness. Here is some Pontification from him to kick this bitch off….

“I could care less if you bring a dry bag or Poison Ivy block. We are here to bring the pain!! Don’t be a PUSSY all your life and get to this hash. We will show you how we don’t get caught by all you A type bastards”

This will be a live trail and he wants a 12 minute head start…why not an hour!? Either way I guess he is calling yall’ bitches out! I hope he wears a colorful thong!

Monday 8/8 Stonecliff
Hares – Deathwish & Some Just…
Prelube – Mikes Tavern any time after 4pm
135 Exeter St, Reading, PA 19601
OnOn – Stonecliff Park
Lehigh & Monroe St Reading PA 19601
Circle 6:15 – Hares Out 6:25 OnOn 6:37
The Hash Waits for No one!

Hash Cash - $5

See you soon, FF

Highly Technical Map!!